STINKY-ness is EVERYWHERE.......

Once again........ there's the original.....one I'm stuck with forever and everrrrr.....


And now...his accomplice has once again RE-APPEARED!!!



So what do you get when you put......


YOU GET.......


Poooor pooooooooor me......, the Perfect Poor ME..... I'd rather stay out in the rain than inside.....*sniff sniff*

(mum: ok drama Queen!! Sunshade LOVES the yard, the fresh Aire. She asks to be let out to the yard a lot, especially to do yard patrol (squirrels, crows, mailman, etc)!!)

I don't want to have anything to do with them, they just stinkify EVERYTHING.....



AND..... STINNNNNNNNKIESSSSSSSSSS



Sigh.....
SIGH.......
SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....


Look at the poor me, still outside even when its dark.....

Lessons - one last attempt

I heard the good news that there is only going to be one STINKY by the end of today. So I thought, maybe, just maybe, I'd be a good Aunt one last time and try to put some sense in them.

Me, the ever so reasonable Aunt (mum: always!), thought I would let the STINKIES do whatever it is that they do for a bit before I start my lessons.


I even shared a shot with STINKY,


(JaffeBoy, the ball you gave ME was stolen from ME by STINKY, and now it stinks. He thinks it's from Kaylie to him...)

However, the more that I watched whatever it is that they do, the more I wanted to stop them.


Because, one, I had no idea what in the world they were doing, and two, it was not particularly productive as far as I could tell.


So I started with my lessons:

Lesson 1 - How to kill bees properly

As usual, STINKY #2 was not paying attention...


STINKY #1 pretended to be paying attention, but was just looking for something for his land shark mouth to bite.

Even when I, the brave Aunt had brought a few bees down for them to have some hands er.. mouth on practice, they just stood around and chickened out!!

ARGHHHHHH!!!!!

Lesson 2 - Tailor made program just for STINKY # 2

Since I'm still gonna be stuck with STINKY # 1 (for like EVERRRRRR), I thought I'd cut him some slacks and just focus on STINKY #2 - the one that never pays attention!


Told her to follow me, she had no choice.


Made sure with my own two SuperEYES that she was indeed paying attention!


I started MY lessons with STINKY #2,

Be Respectful To Your Elders - Showed her what is MINE, and what she is not allowed to touch




(mum: WHAT kind of lessons were THOSE!!!)

Then, during recess time, guess what I saw STINKY #2 doing??


She was TOUCHING MY special rockies with her nose in MY pool!!!

(mum: she was STUDYING!!!!!)


At least she actually paid *some* attention to me, so she passed this time.

Anyways, after STINKY #2 was picked up by Aunty Maureen, it was time for STINKY #1's lesson:

How To Catch and Eat A Fly

I must admit, he did well considering his ADHJD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Jaw Disorder), but he needs more mouth on practice I'm sure!

***************************************************************

Note to Ellen:

Dear Ellen, after seeing my last post, you asked me if I could get a picture of me to match Kingsley.


Well, the unfortunate truth is, that is something ONLY achievable by a STINKY. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but here is the stinky picture.



Sincerely,
Miss Sunshade

(mum: WAIT!!

I think I found something.......

LOOK! It's the SuperSTINKYDALE, or the STINKY SuperDALE, or the SuperDALE when she was a 7 months old STINKY. Whatever you want to call it...


Here is another one taken of the SuperDALE in January of this year..hehe!)


Mum, can you please GET YOUR OWN BLOG??? HMMMMPH!

Will they EVER learn??

I am ready to give up and declare to the whole wide world that my niece (STINKY #2) and nephew (STINKY #1) are totally, completely, utterly hopeless.

SIGH......

Since I knew there was no getting away from the TWO STINKIES, I thought I might as well teach them something useful (since I am the wise one). I wanted to give them the tools for them to at least mature into socially acceptable Airedale beings. So I taught them what I thought was one of the most important things about being an Airedale.



They were calm and paying attention, so I started with my lesson:

You have to locate the "SOURCE" - how many times have I told you that?



Once you have located your "SOURCE" - you have to say "I found it!" out loud



Make sure you say "I found it" a few times from a few different angles so everypup/hooman knows it's YOURS - very important



Once you have declared it YOURS - it's ACTION time!!



I was so focused on giving my lesson, I forgot to pay attention to my students - the STINKIES. They seemed pretty good in the beginning when they just sat and listened to me, so who knew??

I turned around, this is what I saw!


(and they wonder why I don't want to sleep on MY bed????)


Me, being the wise, the perfect, the responsible, the smart Aunt; I couldn't bare to just stand there while I watch my own niece and nephew destroy their futures just like that. So yes, I gave my best shot at salvaging the two STINKIES.


I got STINKY #1's attention for a bit,


STINKY #2 showed me her butt when I tried to talk to her!!



Here is a video that basically summarizes what I went through trying to teach those STINKIES. Yes, I got so frustrated I wanted to leave home.... I just don't believe they are related to me.... HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE??

(please ignore my mum's comments, she had no idea I was trying to TEACH the STINKIES. And please excuse our SUPER messy counter, mum won't let me help her clean up (by eating all the junk ya know..hehe))

GRADES? Do I even need to bother?? They just know how to mess up the WHOLE place!

Will they EVER be able to reach their fullest potential as Airedales Terrorists??

Diary of a worried Aunt......

SHE did it AGAIN!!!

Yea you read it right, I'M MOVING OUT with MY Georgie!!!!! I packed Georgie's pellets, MY RING, MY special rockies, MY pine cones, and some Turkey Parme Biscotties.


We are ready, now we just need to know where to go!

You must be wondering WHY I would want to leave my seemingly wonderful home and my seemingly not so EVIL mum. Well, this is why!

SHE DID IT AGAIN!

She left with ONE STINKY,


Came back with TWO STINKIES! (Just look at their leashes, that's enough to make you go nutty....)


I was *almost* gonna forgive her when I saw she had bought me HUGE new bed, a bag of Innova EVO (the grain free kibble), some treats, some new toys, and the best of all - a huge container of COOKED shepherd's pie (minus the mashed potatoes).


But guess what she told me??

Those aren't for you Sunshade, those are Stella's.

WHAA.....WHAT!!

To make things worse, the STINKIES (original STINKY + STINKY # 2) completely ignored my presence,


HELLLLLLOOOOOOO-OOOOOOOOO!!


How dare they ignore the QUEEN in HER own castle???

Here I was trying to tell them how rude it was for them to ignore ME, and well, did they look like they paid any attention to the low growl I was giving??

Not only that, they STUNK up my bed, so I had to sleep on the floor while they slept on their comfy beds. Where is the justice in that??


I found it hard even to sleep with their presence.... they stink! Now, did they look like they care their poor Aunt was having a hard time breathing??


Even when they saw me dying, their tails were wagging non-stop, no remorse whatsoever. (the reason you don't see either of their tails in this picture is because they were waggging too fast...)


Did they care when I finally succumbed to their stinkiness??


Just look at them, not only were they totally oblivious of their poor Aunt, STINKY #2 even mocked me by copying my dying position!

Now, do you blame me for wanting to LEAVE???


I'm taking MY Georgie because I love him and I don't want him to get stinkified if I left him behind.

Here is the application form if you like us, (click on the picture to enlarge it)

Only qualified homes will get to have us!

(Mum: Stella is only here with us for 10 days while her family goes on vacation. I don't think I would ever get her back even if I wanted to. Her family is too in love with her!!)